Gone are the days where when we used to receive handwritten love letters on our P.O Box. . We have now graduated to Facebook Twitter, Instagram to mention but a few.We now communicate through calls, texts, emails, picture likes and comments on Facebook and Instagram or the Direct Mails on our twitter and Instagram. This days, it is easy to tell when we have been on the minds of our suitors and also exes. Research states that 88% of both men and women stalk their exes on social media. Through those random sometimes constant likes you get from your ex on your Instagram Facebook pictures, The 'hi how have you been' messages on your D. That is for the bold exes because most stalk quietly.
Just curious,What comes to your mind when you get those constant likes on every picture you post from your ex?...what comes on my mind,'this is the guy who finds hard to let go'. People, especially men no longer cut ties with their past lovers.
They leave their 'options open'... you know just in case their current relationship
fails, they have some safe haven where they take their solace. This has negatively affected most love relationships. No matter how hard we try to hide it, the truth always has a way of coming out.
We belong to the days and times where people overwhelmingly prefer reversible decisions to irreversible ones. This could be due to the fear of commitment or just our ways of avoiding commitment that we think could be difficult and impossible to undo. It is now ten times harder to tell which romantic connections are genuine and which are not. You have found your 'one and only' and have started dating only to later find out that he is the kind that keeps track of all his past relationships and has his up-to-date 'likes' on their pictures.
What would you do? 'Keep your options open' as well! ara!
Disengage your focus from that one person and distribute elsewhere... things that make you feel warm and wonderful inside. Treat yourself to the things you love... it could be buying yourself things that make you feel beautiful... going to places that you've always wanted to go or better still, keeping dating other men!. Continue flirting with them and accepting their dinner/coffee dates.
Most would disagree with this but it actually helps you figure out what you want or don't want from a future relationship. It makes you the chooser and not the chaser!... free and not desperate. It is very hard to see the red flags when there is only one man in the horizon. Before you settle down to a relationship you have to be sure he has what you are looking for in a partner. So, optimize your chances and plunge right into it. Get over those hesitant steps you take after every five minutes, sick and worried, wondering what it is he could be doing. In other words, get over your insecurity.
P.S
This is to both Men and women. If you have found your 'one and only', have an understanding of their feelings, let go of the flirts with your exes on your Whatsapp, Facebook and Instagram because it will only dilute your energy and focus from your current relationship. Keeping contacts with your exes bruises trust, especially if you are doing it in secret. I repeat; No matter how hard you try to hide it, the truth always has a way of coming out. Good, secure and trusting relationship rests upon a foundation of
TRUST
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